One of the responsibilities of a songwriter is to note common human traits and invest them with special -- nay, profound -- importance by writing a song about them. And they are of profound importance. Otherwise, why would someone write a song about them? Q.E.D.
In this case, I had divined that people, driven by some mysterious impulse, tended to become specialized, experts in one field or another. Where did I obtain these shattering insights, you ask?
Beats me. I do sort of remember that I was myself somewhat of a "specialist" on marijuana at the time; this might explain it, among other mysteries.
I didn't have a lot of lyrics for it, but no problem. I would "improvise" the rest, a la Jim Morrison.
Do not be alarmed by the person who apparently wanders into the session, randomly intoning the word "Four." It's just me, counting out the last half of the backbeat. (Most rock music uses a heavily-inflected backbeat, viz. one-TWO-three-FOUR.)
Or possibly I was imagining that I was on a golf course, shouting "Fore!" Those years are all a blur. (See above, "marijuana.")
========================[Verse]
Got you a problem you can't ignore?
Are you a victim
Wanna even the score?
File a class action
But your class is too poor?
You need the specialistThe specialist is a programmed man
The time/motion expert
He's got a planDissect the situation
A dedicated fan
You need (yeah you need) the specialist [rpt.]-------------------------------------------------
[Chorus]
Portable computer
And eyes like an eagle
Flowchart folders
And nose like a beagle
Shortcuts
And they're all sort of legalGot an M.B.A.
A B.S.C.
A PhD
A doctorate
An L.L.D., a C.P.A.
an LTD, a monkey wrenchDesignated hitter
Coming off of the bench*************************************
[Let the improvisation commence!]
Specialist!
Expert texpert exorcist
Terrorist
Got you one kiss
For the specialist [rpt.][Let the improvisation cease, already!]
*************************************
[rpt. 1st Verse] ad.lib. out]
========================
I have no idea what that was about. "Got you one kiss/For the specialist"? Sounds like "Give your accountant a hug" or something.
So, that's it, then. I've got other things, but they're too weak or stupid or long (our commonest fault) to inflict on even the most patient of you. This is one of the last things we recorded, but the breakup of the band was by no means acrimonious -- my cousin was getting married to DamnYoko™ and moving to another town in a few weeks. Ah, well. Sic transit gloria and all that.
Alternate site: The Specialist Warning: Both links are embedded QuickTime audio.
Previous:
H.U.A.C.
Walk Away
Fashion Patrol
Life's Embarrassing Moments
Cry Me A River
I Got A Girl
The Very Last Man On Earth
Golddigger
Hangin' In The Park
Just So You Know
Caught By Computer
Me & J.B.
By The Lake
Dirty Little Secret
Fire In The Waxworks
Warning Shots
The Chase
Just Like A Woman