Iowahawk knocks one out of the Colosseum one of those Greek amphitheater thingies his misspent years of Classics Studies:
Speak to me, O Muse, of this resourceful man who strides so boldly upon the golden shrine at Invescos,
Between Ionic plywood columns, to the kleig light altar. Fair Obamacles, favored of the gods, ascends to Olympus
Amidst lusty tributes and the strumming lyres of Media; Their mounted skyboxes echo with the singing of his name
While Olbermos and Mattheus in their greasy togas wrassle
For first honor of basking in their hero's reflected glory.
Who is this man, so bronzed in countenance, So skilled of TelePrompter, clean and articulate whose ears like a stately urn's protrude?So now, daughter of Zeus, tell us his story. And just the Cliff Notes if you don't mind, We don't have all day.