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January 14, 2004

It Must Be Jelly . . .

This is, er . . . interesting. On a number of levels. WARNING: Definitely not work-safe.

(Via Spoons.)

January 19, 2004

Shake It Up

This is an interesting site. It takes the content from one webpage and merges it into the structure of another. I tried it with my blog and the White House and laughed and laughed. But then, I am easily amused. (Via Matthew Stinson.)

Speaking of funny, I found out today that Margaret Cho has a blog. And it's every bit as funny as her stage act.

February 13, 2004

Mango Tango

Via Ghost of a Flea:

I've long been curious whether Australia has many itinerant musicians performing spoken-word blues.

Apparently not. But at least they have this.

March 8, 2004

The Sanguine Penguin

Stupid penguin.

I want to hit it so bad.

Why isn't there a T-ball version?

(Warning: kinda gory.)

Sharp Dressed Man

As you may (or may not) know, I am a supporter of George W. Bush.

However, if there's any truth to this, I might have to reconsider my position.

Warning: there's annoying music, so you might want to turn your speaker down if at work.

March 12, 2004

Kung Fu Fighting

Step 1 Pick a t-shirt that you know the other ninjas will not bother you about. I choose one of my "Clerks" shirts because "Clerks" is ninja in itself.

step01.gif

You, too, can become a ninja in seven easy steps.

Top Of The Pops

At last, a game I can win nearly every time!

Via Dean Esmay.

March 21, 2004

You Can't Always Get What You Want

You would think that a site named badgerbadgerbadger would be the place to go for quality badger-related amusement, but you would be wrongwrongwrong.

Sure, there's the obligatory dancing badgers, but in a bid for more "sophistication," there are several non-badger scenes, such as a mushroom and a snake.

The result? A crashing artistic failure. The joyous quintessence of dancing badgers is subverted and compromised by these foreign -- dare I say sinister? --elements.

Misleading and disappointing link courtesy of Autonomous Source.

Go complain to him, loudly and bitterly.

September 8, 2004

Googlogorrhea

Use Google talk by entering three or four words below. The system will search for this sentence at Google, find the next word and print that. Than it will remove the first word of the search string, add the found word and repeat. The result seems to be meaningfull sometimes. Other times it is giblish. But always fun.




Google talk
a
Google Hack
by
Douwe Osinga

Try entering famous names: "Osama bin Laden is"; "George Bush can't," etc. Or definitions: "meaning of life is"; "madness is" and so on. Or questions: "Is Iraq a quagmire?" (Remember the four word limit.)

It will get stuck in an infinite loop occasionally: did did did DID DID DID . . . seems to be the most popular one.

Via The Presurfer

September 29, 2004

The Number Of Your Name

This is something that'll show you the popularity of your first name through the last century, at least in the U.S. (It uses names culled from Social Security registrations.)

Q: Is this blog getting even more lame lately, or what?

A: It is. I should be back to my usual standard of sustained mediocrity by next week.

Via The Presurfer

October 9, 2004

One For The Weekend

This has been posted at a number of sites, but it wouldn't work for me when I tried it until today. Use the up and down arrow keys to zoom in or out.

I didn't look at it for too long, but people seem quite impressed with it.

Happy Thanksgiving to Canuckian readers -- Merry Columbus Day (or however you say it) to our American friends. I'll be going for dinner at my sister's place, so I'll probably be incommunicado until Monday.

October 13, 2004

I Blame My Research Staff

How to tell when I've got absolutely nothing to talk about?

This might be a clue . . .


Continue reading "I Blame My Research Staff" »

November 11, 2004

But Wait! There's More!

Hey, kids! Have you always wanted to leave comments on fine fora like Democratic Underground or Atrios but weren't sure what to say? Well, Sean Gleeson comes to the rescue with his Autorantic Virtual Moonbat generator!

Within minutes, you'll be cranking out quality foam-flecked screeds such as this!

Once again, the Nazis have STOLEN the so-called "election"!!! The henchmen of Karl Rove drugged minority voters in Florida!!!!!!!!! And their last-minute SCARE TACTICS of accusing John Kerry of being a crash test dummy, and trying to focus on the Constitution instead of REAL ISSUES like Vietnam were calculated to frighten so-called "men" into VOTING!!!! If you're not MOPEY about this, then you're a BIG IDIOT!

You'll fit right in with your new friends! And if you act now, Sean will send you FREE OF CHARGE a 12-piece set of "authentic" "bone-handle" "steak" knives!!!!

Via Tim Blair

July 17, 2005

Blue Bells, Cockle Shells

easy ivy over
oh no, here comes miss blackwell
with her big black stick
now it's time for arithmetic

trad.

I blame electricity deregulation for this shocking development.

Via grow-a-brain

November 15, 2005

Taxi Cab

taxicab, taxicab at the light
won’t you take me on a ride
through this city at night

bruce springsteen

This is sort of a variation of Burger King's Subservient Chicken; you get to play a taxi driver throwing his passenger around by steering erratically and braking and accelerating. (You can also press these keys for other reactions: b,n,m,w,e,h,p,s.) Warning: Music and sfx.

It's an ad for Sprint cellphone service. I'm not really clear on the connection between cellphones and maniacal cabbies, but there you have it.

December 14, 2005

The Dismal Science

Well, it made me laugh.

June 20, 2006

Eve Of Desktruction

deskVodafone caters to violent office fantasies by feeding various desks into an industrial crusher. May not be safe for work, depending on how your boss feels about furniture. There's sound, but you can turn it off with a button at the top right of the page.

Via J-Walk Blog

July 2, 2006

Cheap Blotter Trip; No Police Blotter Stop

An animated optical pattern that induces visual distortions familiar to LSD users. Not that I would know anything about that.

And no, it isn't what's known as a "flash screamer," i.e., something that bids you to pay close attention to the screen and then suddenly switches to a snarling demon.

Maybe it was funny the first time someone did it, but it's now just irritating and juvenile. Also, I got stung by another one yesterday.

But even if it's irritating and juvenile, it's still funny to watch other people get hit. Warning: Music in first link; banners maybe NSFW in second; sounds.

July 25, 2006

Next Stop, Catblogging

This blog isn't only about gritty geopolitical analysis and incisive commentary on world events, you know. Sometimes a guy just likes to kick back and play with his pretty dollies.
elouai's doll maker 3

My pretty dolly would be even prettier if the stupid Javascript code worked and you could see the twinkling animated backgrounds. Click on the picture to go to the site and design your own pretty dolly, one that looks like a celebrity. You can change her hair, mouth, etc., which is a good thing, because the only celebrity I can think of with those manga-styled eyes is Marty Feldman. If you want to, you can design a pretty boy dolly, too. *

martyfeldman




*Not that there's anything wrong with that.**




-------------------
**You sicko.

August 5, 2006

Goggles

gogglesA flight simulator of sorts, created by superimposing an airplane onto a backdrop of Google Maps. You can turn, go up (not really -- the mapscale doesn't increase) or down (too low and you crash) or fire your spacebar gun at nothing in particular.

I have no idea where the terrain is, but I feel safe to say that it has tennis courts.

Update: I didn't at first notice it, but you can pick from London, New York, Paris, Tokyo and Washington, DC.


August 9, 2006

SingShot

Oh, this is cruel. SingShot is a karaoke site that lets you put your vocal chops out there for all to vote on, and laugh at.

Witness:

Sert, or "Ché" as his friends call him, is a Turkish gentleman. This is not a hard-and-fast rule, but I find that if someone demonstrates no singing talent by the age of 26, it's unlikely to be lurking just below the surface.

I've chosen to showcase Sert's rendition of The Beatles' "Yesterday" because:

a) It's an easily recognizable tune, the most-recorded in history, and;

b) because it's mercifully brief.

The site is still in beta and kind of wonky. If the song stops, wave your cursor over the flash player. For the love of God, don't click on it, because then you'll have to listen to it from the start again.

It's a pay site, but offers a two-week free trial. (You won't be asked for a credit card until the two weeks are up.) I couldn't find out how much it costs, because when I clicked through to find out, I was rewarded with this message:

Your session has been expired!
Please re-login, to access our services

Kind of strange, considering I hadn't logged in at all. Like I said, the site still seems to have some bugs.

Note, too, that you don't have to subscribe to it to listen to recordings, vote on them or comment -- it's only if you want to record your Whitney Houston impressions for posterity and the chance to become the laughingstock of the Internet. Maybe that's why the poor woman found solace in drugs.

Update: The folks at SingShot were kind enough to send this comment:

Hi - We're sorry about this error with the link in our Help / FAQ section. It will get fixed shortly, but just so you have the info, our subscription fees after the 2 week trial are:
US $4.95 per month if you commit to an annual subscription plan.
US $7.95 per month if you commit to a quarterly subscription plan.
US $9.95 per month if you commit to an annual subscription plan.

I believe that last option should be for a monthly, rather than annual subscription. I would say that it looks like good value if you're into karaoke. There's an impressive amount of (officially licensed) music.

January 18, 2007

Hannibal Assembler

onoprienko


This could be a tough one, because they share similar sadistic tendencies. Serial killer or operating language programmer?

Warning: Sound effects.

October 30, 2007

Boo!

halloween

Depressed because you can't find the right disguise for Halloween? Fret no more -- the blog quebecois is on the case!

For some years now (and for some strange reason), Forbes.com has been putting up pictures of the famous and infamous, suitable for downloading, printing and cutting out for Halloween masks. (They print out at a larger size than illustrated.) If Mahmoud Ahmadinejad doesn't do it for you, there are 17 others, ranging from Britney Spears to the entire cast of 2008 Presidential candidates. Or you can scroll down the page and select someone from their archives, dating back to 2003.

No, don't thank me. It's all part of the service. Now dry those tears (not good for the masks, especially if you use the same cheap paper as me) and get out there and party like it's 1999.

December 14, 2007

Like Snowflakes -- No Two Alike

Chicago Tribune:

"It's kind of like Grandma's recipe," he observed. "A pinch of this, two shakes of that. You kind of know when it's right."

Update: Crap. The paper has moved the story into a firewalled archive, so I registered (the things I do for you!), stole the whole story, and you can read it below:

Continue reading "Like Snowflakes -- No Two Alike" »

December 19, 2007

Poo Christmas

teddybeargun

Yes, that's a gun that fires teddy bears. Although crime is rare in Japan, when it happens, it is absolutely hilarious.

If you're running short on Christmas present ideas, Cracked looks at the 25 Most Baffling Toys From Around The World; most of which, for some baffling reason, hail from Japan.

Warning: Language and a surfeit of poop-related products.

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